im feeling super stressed now adays, and the worse part of it all is that it ist one bit about my studies. how long am i to hold on to this playful game? how long will it take for me to realise its too late. how long will i finally understand all this time that my family cares? i dont know. i dont know at all. im so caught on holding on & letting go at the same time i feel that im falling too deep into another hole. another mistake another regrette another lie. & each time i pick up that call a sense of happiness fills me up inside yet deep down inside i know its a lie. a fucking white lie i tell myself to prevent me from feeling weak.feeling helpless feeling nothing & why do i even bother doing this when at the end of the day i say i love you but look away in shame. they say jealousy is the root of all evil. what they say is true. but they forgot. i'm part of that evil too.
